Twenty years ago, I wanted to be a writer. Inspired by teachers and an interest in penning ideas, I earned an English degree in college. After starting a career as a language arts teacher, I envisioned a future with stories that lockers told, hysterical tales of middle school. Nothing came of it in those years but I always considered starting to write again. At the end of 2019, I started this blog, thinking it would give me both a creative outlet and a place to document the chaos and love of our everyday lives.

Little did I know….it would be halted by the mere exhaustion of surviving a year that no one saw coming.

Although a full year later, there aren’t words to fully describe what has happened. Two school years have been altered, businesses have been shuttered, families have lost loved ones, plans have been paused, and local stay at home orders have created isolation and struggles that haven’t been seen in hundreds of years.

Our nation is more divided than ever, the winter holiday season for 2020 was spent in separate quarantined rooms for our family, and it has become a fine balance between savoring every moment and living life and halting almost every normal behavior in order to protect your family.

While the universe slowly burns this dumpster fire and the sparks continue to fly, I can’t help but wonder how to maintain perspective.

What lesson is to be learned from this unprecedented year?

The sheer privilege that we have experiences, in spite of this pandemic, isn’t lost on me. We missed out on things this year that some families never experience, even during non-pandemic times. But, we also separated ourselves from small, daily moments that show up in photos memories and give you happy tears. My heart is missing the interactions and mind movies that play when we are with our families. My mind wants to say, “Screw it. Let’s live life to the fullest.” My heart reminds me that the risk involved isn’t worth it in the long run. And my patience and sanity are tugging on the need for a dedicated mission to move forward into the Christmas season and 2021 with a path that is somewhere in the middle.

How will we get there? I’m not quire sure. But, we’ll start with 33 lessons help us focus on perspective. Surely there have been gains along this crazy train.